THE DISENFRANCHISED GRIEF OF PREGNANCY LOSS

Disenfranchised grief is defined as grief that is not socially supported, either because the relationship with the person lost is not recognised, the loss itself is not recognised or the griever is not recognised1. In the case of pregnancy loss, it is usually that the loss is not recognised making it difficult to grieve properly.
Across sub-Saharan Africa, death is traditionally perceived as the process by which a person becomes an ancestor2. With pregnancy loss, there was no opportunity for the foetus to become a person, not to talk of an ancestor; this makes it very difficult for a typical woman or couple to come to terms with what exactly has been lost and how to mourn that loss.
The mourning practices of Nigerians in particular stem from a religious perspective, due to Nigeria’s triple heritage of Christianity, Islam and Traditional religions1. There is, however, no mourning practice for a pregnancy loss. A change to this should be considered as it has been reported that unacknowledged loss and a lack of grief rituals for the loss can challenge healing after pregnancy loss3.
In Nigeria, obituaries and memorials are used to celebrate a person’s life achievements and position in society2; it is an opportunity to list out all the family members that will miss that person. After a miscarriage, there are people that are affected by the loss, people who already loved this tiny foetus and were dreaming of the day the child would be born and the changes he/she would bring to their lives. But the very nature of first trimester loss is that there is a sense that one has lost someone so loved but has nothing to show for it; there is no actual visible person to mourn.
There is a need for an accepted approach to the process of dealing with a pregnancy loss. Without this, there is the risk that the accompanying grief, which goes unacknowledged, may be too much for the woman to bear, especially if she does not have the essential social support or the empowerment that comes from education to deal with it in her own way.

REFERENCES
1. Eyetsemitan F, “Cultural interpretation of dying and death in a Non-Western society: the case of Nigeria”, Online Readings in Psychology and Culture, Unit 14, Chapter 1. ©International Association for Cross-Cultural Psychology, 2002.
2. “Death, Mourning and Ancestors”, accessed from http://www.novelguide.com/a/discover/aes_01/aes_01_00107.html on 29/04/11
3. Douglas K I, Fox J R, “Tears of blood: understating and creatively intervening in the grief of miscarriage”, Compelling Counselling Interventions: VISTAS 2009, pp89-100, ©American Counselling Association, 2009.